When celebrities and socialites split up, supermarket tabloids and online gossipers are quick to speculate about how much money each party will walk away with and who will get the house in the Hamptons. Little, if anything, is ever said about where the couple’s children will live going forward, or how the couple plans to co-parent.
In some ways this is good — every family deserves a little bit of privacy during a divorce. But it also has a downside. It can make us Average Joes (and Janes) feel like we are foolish for caring more about our custody agreement than anything of monetary value.
But at Aiello & DiFalco LLP, we know that the time you spend with your children is your most important asset, and we are quick to reassure our clients that putting their best interest first is perfectly fine. In fact, we work with families in Garden City and beyond to ensure that the welfare of their children is the number one priority during and after a divorce or separation by crafting child custody agreements that fit your family’s unique needs.
If a Child Lives on Long Island, Who Can Seek Custody?
New York law assumes both parents will want custody of their child following a divorce. Crafting a shared custody agreement that helps preserve and grow the relationship each parent has with the child is encouraged. To make this happen, you and your former partner should be prepared to develop a positive co-parenting relationship, even though you are no longer in a romantic relationship.
Other family members may seek custody of a child living on Long Island if one or both parents are unable or unwilling to fulfil their parental duties. Grandparents, legal guardians, and even third parties can seek custody under certain circumstances. However, they must demonstrate that they have a substantial relationship with the child and that awarding custody to them is in the child’s best interest.
The seasoned attorneys at Aiello & DiFalco LLP are ready to work with you to craft a child custody agreement and parenting plan that fits your family and ensures your child is well cared for.
Long Island Parents Typically Share Legal and Physical Custody
When talking about child custody, most Long Islanders assume we are talking about the time they spend with their children. But that is just one half of the child custody equation. Under New York Law, child custody is divided into two categories — physical custody and legal custody.
- Physical Custody is what most people assume child custody means — the amount of time you get to spend with your child. And the steps you take to ensure their day-to-day needs are met.
- Legal Custody refers to the authority you have as a parent to make important decisions on behalf of your child, including those related to your child’s education, healthcare, and religion.
As an example, legal custody involves deciding if your child is going to attend public or private school. If you have primary physical custody, you are responsible for making sure your child gets to that chosen school each day.
Most Long Island couples share both physical and legal custody of their children. Legal custody is typically split 50/50, while physical custody is shared in whatever way is best for the child. This may mean that the child spends significantly more time with one parent than the other, but that does not diminish the important role each parent plays in the child’s life.
Is Negotiation or Litigation Better?
While custody disputes can be resolved through negotiation or litigation, most parents prefer to negotiate an agreement rather than let a Long Island family court judge decide their fate.
Negotiating an agreement — or using the services of a mediator or other third party — allows you to preserve some privacy and maintain control over the outcome. It also allows families to craft a custody agreement that truly meets their needs. For example, when one parent travels for work, it may be necessary to build some flexibility into the visitation schedule to ensure they get all the family time they desire.
When agreement cannot be struck outside of court, Aiello & DiFalco’s experienced team of attorneys are ready to litigate. Over the years, we have gone to court to fight for our clients in cases where:
- There was no way the parents were going to come to an amicable agreement
- One parent was lying
- There was evidence of domestic abuse, neglect, or drug or alcohol abuse
- A parent wanted to move away from (or stay on) Long Island while the other did not
- Disagreements over child rearing made sharing legal custody extremely difficult
And this is just the tip of the iceberg. We have seen nearly every family dynamic and disagreement over the years, but we always manage to find a path forward.
Enforcing Child Custody Agreements on Long Island
While we all want to assume that co-parents will do everything in their power to comply with the terms of a well-crafted child custody agreement, the reality is you are both going to slip up at some point in time.
But there is a big difference between being a few minutes late for drop-off and completely blowing off your kid with no warning. Or letting a child have dessert before dinner and giving them the keys to the liquor cabinet.
When one parent has unilaterally and dramatically altered or violated the child custody agreement, it is necessary to take legal action. At Aiello & DiFalco LLP, we can help you evaluate the situation and take action to enforce your child custody agreement and protect your child.
Child Custody’s Impact on Child Support
Child custody and child support are closely linked in New York. The parent with primary physical custody typically receives child support payments from the non-custodial parent to cover the child’s needs.
Parents on Long Island must also consider if payments should be adjusted based on the family’s wealth (since many Long Island families exceed the income cap in the child support guidelines) and the lifestyle they expect their child to live. If, for example, you have shared legal custody of your child, and you and your former partner jointly decide to send your child to private school, sign them up for extracurricular activities, or hire a tutor, nanny, or other specialized caregiver, you should also discuss who is paying for each of these things.
The Aiello & DiFalco team can help you think about how these two important issues overlap, and how best to ensure your child is well taken care of.
Modifying Your Child Custody Agreement
Life changes, and so can custody agreements. Modifications may be necessary if there is a substantial change in circumstances, such as a parent moving away from (or to) Long Island, a change in work schedule, or the child’s evolving needs.
No matter what conditions have led you to desire a change to your current child custody agreement, the experienced attorneys at Aiello & DiFalco can help you gather the evidence you need to persuade a Long Island family court judge that a change is necessary. If your former partner is the one seeking a change, and you do not think it is warranted, we can also help you defend your current plan.
Dedicated to You & Your Family In Your Time of Need
At Aiello & DiFalco LLP, we understand that navigating child custody matters can be one of the most emotional and challenging aspects of a divorce or separation. Our priority is to support you in crafting solutions that work for your family… not a celebrity or the neighbor next door.
Whether you are negotiating a new custody agreement, seeking to modify an existing arrangement, or addressing violations of a custody order, our experienced Long Island attorneys are here to guide you every step of the way. We combine legal expertise with compassion, working to minimize conflict and foster positive outcomes for you and your child.
We take pride in helping Long Island families build custody agreements that are fair, flexible, and focused on the child’s well-being. No matter how complex your situation may seem, you don’t have to face it alone. Contact Aiello & DiFalco LLP today for a consultation, and let us help you create a brighter future for your family on Long Island.